TU, TUME (Tum) and APANA (Aap), though all carry the same meaning, are three different ways of addressing here. The choice of words depends on the the famiarity and strata in society of the person at the receiving end. It's common to address ones mother, siblings and friends (on basis of familiarity), or people of the lowest strata in society with TU. Next comes the next layer of address TUME or TUM is reserved for the more respectful uncles, spouces, boy-girl friends and people at the next level of strata. APANA or AAP is reserved for the best, the elderly folks, teachers and those at highest strata of society.
Sometimes a change in social status, in relationship or otherwise, changes the way of addressing. In most arranged marriages the couples address each other as TUME (TUM). In the case of marriages preceded by datings (dating in India may not be exactly the American way of dating) or called love marriages in local parlance (in most cases it's less love, more self arranged), during the pre marital courtship the couples address themselves as TU (if classmates of close age) or TUME (more popular). But after marriage, the bride usually addresses the groom as TUME or TUM (our is still a male dominated society). It's not unusual for such couples to come down addressing with TU, when they fight or get down to the basic instincts, as TU is the base way of addressing.
I have seen the dilemma in addressing when some one's elder sibling gets married. A person, who for ever has addressed his elder brother as TU, finds it little odd to address his BHAUJA or BHAVI (brother's wife) as TUM. Eventually he or she adjusts (another ubiquitous word, we adjust a lot in our society).
In English language it's always you, you and only you. A two liner Odia limerick from our childhood goes as follows.
AGYAN APANA TUME TU,
TUMA MUHARE KUKURA MUTU
Respected base(you), better (you) and the best(you),
May a dog pee on the face of you.
Once upon a time, Bhubaneswar was filled with Cycle Rickshaws. Everybody from our generation has yelled HE RICKSHAW JIBU (O' Rickshaw will you go). Now it's replaced by HE AUTO JIBA or JIBE KI ? (O' Auto, will you go). A rickshaw puller was rarely called JIBA (better respected expression) and Auto driver is rarely called TU or JIBU (least respected expression). Either denizens have become more respectful, or the transformation from a Rickshaw puller to Auto driver has gone has earned them respect. More about Autos tomorrow....
Sometimes a change in social status, in relationship or otherwise, changes the way of addressing. In most arranged marriages the couples address each other as TUME (TUM). In the case of marriages preceded by datings (dating in India may not be exactly the American way of dating) or called love marriages in local parlance (in most cases it's less love, more self arranged), during the pre marital courtship the couples address themselves as TU (if classmates of close age) or TUME (more popular). But after marriage, the bride usually addresses the groom as TUME or TUM (our is still a male dominated society). It's not unusual for such couples to come down addressing with TU, when they fight or get down to the basic instincts, as TU is the base way of addressing.
I have seen the dilemma in addressing when some one's elder sibling gets married. A person, who for ever has addressed his elder brother as TU, finds it little odd to address his BHAUJA or BHAVI (brother's wife) as TUM. Eventually he or she adjusts (another ubiquitous word, we adjust a lot in our society).
In English language it's always you, you and only you. A two liner Odia limerick from our childhood goes as follows.
AGYAN APANA TUME TU,
TUMA MUHARE KUKURA MUTU
Respected base(you), better (you) and the best(you),
May a dog pee on the face of you.
Once upon a time, Bhubaneswar was filled with Cycle Rickshaws. Everybody from our generation has yelled HE RICKSHAW JIBU (O' Rickshaw will you go). Now it's replaced by HE AUTO JIBA or JIBE KI ? (O' Auto, will you go). A rickshaw puller was rarely called JIBA (better respected expression) and Auto driver is rarely called TU or JIBU (least respected expression). Either denizens have become more respectful, or the transformation from a Rickshaw puller to Auto driver has gone has earned them respect. More about Autos tomorrow....
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