Human relationships can be fickle, fragile, fake - a mix of some or all the above. It often defying logic. Many folks I have noticed have temperamental relationships which repeat every year like seasons. I call it Animalistic relationship. Animals get friendly during their few months of mating season every year, rest of the year they spend fighting with one another. This habit gets repeated every year.
Man is nothing but an intelligent animal. A similar pattern is followed by the homo sapien species. We have a couple of relatives whom I have been following for few decades. One year at our various family gatherings and social functions they would fight tooth to nail, the next year they are seen being extremely friendly, hugging and embracing one another, embarrassing others by such turncoat behavior. Again the very next year they will get into fighting mode and the following year they will patch up yet again. This has been going on for several decades now.
One particular year when both families were in a fighting mode, they came separately to our house to complain against each other. My parents would interject - if you guys can't get along why not just cut off the relationship ? For years we have been observing this farcical endless cycle of fracas and squabbling followed by patch ups and bear hugs. This repeats every year like seasons. Just let go this relationship and move on for God's safe. You are making a laughing stock of yourself. No one will take you seriously if you keep doing this.
They responded by considering my parents as interlopers, retorting back - We are blood relations and blood is thicker than water. We fight, make up to fight yet again and don't mind getting into this infinite loop of break ups and mending. How can you say we take a break from this ? Shit happens between relations, but we love to get entangled in this shit. This is how we live and have no qualms with this pattern repeating every year.
"Fair enough. It's your life to live the way you like. But stop compIaining and bitching behind each other. Respect the thickness of your blood by living amicably. You guys don't have to fight" - my parents replied. Not sure how they took it, but this farce gets re-enacted each year.
Such relationships are not just limited to our family. It's pretty much rampant, especially in our DESI (as Persons of Indian origin are ascribed to) community in America. More than any thickness of blood pragmatism is the glue which keeps them together though they enjoy engaging in their periodic squabblings. There are no permanent friends or enemies, only permanent interest thrives - ethics or morality be damned.
Inexplicable it may sound, but these aren't minor human foibles to be ignored. Logically it doesn't make sense. But we humans are inherently complex and our relationships are complicated affairs. Love (its opposite hate too) is strongest when it's unseasonable. Emotion is known to override logic. Your public hater could be your secret admirer. Psychologists struggle to explain it.
My take - if a relationship doesn't work simply move on. No one in the world and at this age indispensable. Graveyard is full of indispensable. Time and tide wait for non. Life goes on. No wonder Lord Krishna espoused his buddy Arjun in our epic Hindu scripture BHAGAVAT GITA to use weapons against his own relatives - because for a higher cause human relationships doesn't matter, so let it go if necessary for the sake of duty and sanity. Sri Krishna was way ahead of his time and the eternal truth spoken by him still stands out.
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