My Corona Diary

Today I was supposed to travel to India on a month long vacation. I planned the trip way back in January, bought my tickets in advance in Delta Airlines (Atlanta - Delhi - Atlanta) and in Air India (Delhi - Bhubaneswar- Delhi). Never in my wildest of dreams I ever imagined that I will have to cancel my tickets (cancelling tickets does not mean anything now at a time when Flights aren't operating). 

As I completed two months of working from home, social distancing, rubbing sanitizers and frequently washing my hands, the first long weekend of the year is approaching in this unusual time of COVID-19. Most years I go on vacation at this time of the year - the last Monday of May being first Holiday since January in a country where number of holidays are limited. When I should be munching succulent Mangoes and stripping off white flesh off Lychees in 100 degree (38°C) heat of Bhubaneswar, I am hunkered down in my bunker inside in Georgia. 

My trip to India this time was supposed to be eventful. A diehard Modi BHAKT (Blind follower) not long ago threatened me in Odia "Bhubaneswar KU ASILE GODEI GODEI KHANDA RE HANIBI" - will hack you down with a sword by chasing you soon after you land at Bhubaneswar. He probably saw one of Shakti Kapoor's movies where the perpetual badass of Bollywood cinema was chased by the hero Mithun Chakraborty with a scimitar on hand as his fitting finale revenge.

I would have loved all of you to arrive one fine sunny morning upon my arrival at the Bhubaneswar Airport not to miss this classic scene of me running bare bodied only attired in my CHADDI (underwear), chased by a sword holding guy. You could have recorded it for posterity and shared on social media. It would have assured you of getting million plus hits. Unfortunately, the spectacle of the century needs to wait. COVID-19 put a wrench on the wheels on my dream and dreams of many.

These days I shave once a week. While shaving I am reminded of the popular Palmolive Shaving Cream Commercial during my growing up days in India - "Kapil Dev, tough cricketer, tough beard". I am not a tough person from any angle, but my razors stumble on my stubble gained in a week, giving me a tough time. Shaving saga apart, so far I have managed to save my job as tens of millions of Americans join unemployed bandwagon every week. Things not looking so good at this moment.

This is not the only thing I have saved so far as my expenses are inadvertently curtailed. I am not helping Uncle Sam as much as 2/3rd of US Economy is fuelled by consumer spending. Despite record low gas prices, I don't drive more than 10 miles a week. I filled gas only once in last couple of months. Under normal circumstances, I fill up my gas tank at least once every other week. Not anymore. That's a first time in America in nearly quarter of a century. 

Yet on a positive note, I help the environment. Lesser use of car means less emission of toxic greenhouse gas. My environmental support doesn't stop there. Lesser use of Office resources like computer printouts, electricity, elevators, AC and so on. I can proudly proclaim of saving some trees and restricting the use of CFC (CloroFluoroCarbon).

When I feel bored I used to loiter around Groceries and Pharmacy Stores, Strip Malls (usually avoid Malls. I feel them artificial and boring, though I love their food courts). Now I am the only person in my family who goes out, very frugally no more than couple of times a week to buy groceries and run other errands. Define monotony.

I hate alcohol during the day. But the Coronavirus has forced me to do so - in the form of hand sanitizers and alcohol soaked hand wipes. While entering the store, I use hand sanitizer and after returning back to my car I use again. I wash my hands way too often and way too long, thanks to this nouveau virus - would have been easily branded as SUCHIBAI ROGI (An Odia slang for a psychological patient with the habit of compulsive cleanliness, a tell-tale sign of insecurity). Taking no chances against this dreaded COVID-19. Have no desire to get infected and gift it to my family. Twitching the usual Odia proverb a bit - "HATHA DHOU THA, GUNA GAU THA" (Wash you hands, sing paeans of praise of COVID-19). Learning to stay safe the hard way.

My first tryst with Corona was not virus, rather a brand of shoes. During my childhood days there were only a handful of decent shoe stores in Bhubaneswar, prominent were Bata, Corona and BSC brand carrying stores in Unit II. I could relate to a friend of mine in school who had an aura about him, his claim to fame was following ABBA, Boney M music. There were hardly anyone to fact check on him. Often he used to sing something with snorted lips, which resembled "Corona...Shoes.....Shoes....Shoooooes.. Whoooos". I was completely spellbound. Ignorance can be bliss, but for me it metamorphosed into sheer adulation. That's the only Corona I was aware of until the arrival of another kind earlier this year.

A person once went to an astrologer, who after seeing his chart said " After two years you will enter into a state of poverty and start begging". "What will happen after that ?" asked the person who now was somewhat concerned. The astrologer responded "You will get used to it". Eventually we will get used to COVID-19. 

BIHANGA BIPLABA - Mutiny of the birds

Remember the story BIHANGA BIPLABA (The Mutiny of Birds) from our School SAHITYA (Odia literature) textbook ? Taught to us in Class VI, it is a very funny story with powerful connotations.

A bunch of birds protested to their Bear King against the ordeals they had to go through in their jungle milieu. The wise King gave them a patient hearing. He was about to give his verdict in their favor, when the clever monkey againdt whom the birds revolted, intervened to manipulate his decision by bribing the King with a ripened Jackfruit, a delicacy for the animal (Asiatic Bears are fine climbers, known to go up the Jackfruit trees and feast on them). 

The shrewd monkey threw a hint to the Bear King - "TIKE AGAKU PACHHAKU DEKHI BICHAARA KARANTU" (Please deliver your verdict after looking at both front and back sides. Lost in translation, the phrase TIKE AGAKU PACHHAKU DEKHI in Odia carries its own meaning). 

The old King didn't see anything in front, but behind the back of his throne he saw the ripe Jackfruit, enough to lure him into reversing his verdict, now favorable to the monkey.The betrayed birds took their anger on the Bear King by swooning over him, mauling him to death. I still fondly remember a sentence from that story - RE KAAU RAAU RAAU HUANA (Hey crow, don't caw with you coarse voice).

Jackfruit is synonymous with the summer season in Odisha. It brings back memories from home. Come late spring and early summer (Spring comes early in India in the month of February & Summer in April), it's time to savor the raw variety of this fibrous fruit in the form of fries, curry or part of DALMA (an Odia dish of boiled lentils &veggies). Its high fiber assues a bowel movement clean as whistle.

As the Spring gives way to Summer, the fruit starts to ripen, reaching its peak before the advent of monsoon. In late summer the ripened Jackfruits form an essential part of the Odia festive occasions of Savitri and Raja. In my native village, we owned an orchard filled with Jackfruit trees. Most fruitful of them were given various nicknames, based on their color, texture and taste. A particular one, leaning right into the river BHARGAVI was called PODA RANGI PANASA (Smouldering Red Jackfruit) for its bright red color and sweet, succulent pulp.

Not just Puri's vicinity, Bhubaneswar then was a sleepy township of salaried people was filled with Jackfruit trees, quite a common sight inside the compounds of the government quarters. It was closely followed by Papaya, SAJANA CHHUIN (Drumsticks) trees. During the summer months one can see huge cylindrical jackfruits protruding from their trunks, a la the sagging fats of an enormous Sumo wrestler.

When they start to ripen, this fruit emits a strong smell which attracts bats, bears and jackals - the name jackfruit probably comes from the later. Though Jackels can't climb trees, the feast on the ripe fruits near trunk of the trees almost touching the ground. However, bears don't mind climbing atop to devour the succulent inside.

It brings a deja vu feeling in me of my childhood summer trips to our village when passing through TOTA (orchard) one can smell the ripe jackfruit from a distance. The villagers back then used to cherish the juice extracted from ripe jackfruits, occasionally mixed with milk and often consumed during dinner. Not sure if it's the same these days.

Tini Tunda Re Chheli Kukura

Nazi Germany's propaganda minister Joseph Goebbels famously said - "If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it". He wasn't far from the truth.

But far before the rise of Hitler, more than a thousand year ago in Ancient India our master storyteller Vishnu Sharma elucidated the same in one of his famous stories from his PANCHA TANTRA (The five treatise) as follows.

Once a group of three friends saw a Brahmin carrying a goat on his shoulders. They wanted to acquire the goat for themselves and came up with a master plan. The first friend walked to the Brahmin and addressed him acting perplexed - "Sir, you are carrying a pig on your shoulders". "Are you out of your mind ? Can't you see that I am carrying a goat ?" - dismissed the Brahmin. 

After a while the second guy appears in front of the Brahmin and starts laughing at him - "Pundit jee, how silly of you to carry a donkey on your shoulder ?". "What ? Today it seems I am having a bad day, encountering some blind and crazy people", said the Brahmin and walked on.

No sooner he had walked a furlong further, than he saw the third guy who approached him with an inquisitive look - "O' the pious one. How on earth a sacred brahmin like you is carrying a dirty animal like dog on your shoulder ?" The Brahmin was now scared to death. He was convinced that he is not carrying a goat but a ghost who is metamorphing into different animal forms. He threw the goat away and fled, leaving it to mercy of the three amigos.

We have heard of the Odia proverb "TINI TUNDARE CHHELI KUKURA", meaning when word travels across three mouths, a goat can be transformed into a dog. So true. As words gets transported from mouth to mouth they can get distorted beyond words. Same thing happens when a message travelling on the Social media gets metamorphosed with its far reaching consequences with ripple effects.

North korea does similar propaganda. The commoners in their country believe that their Dear Leader Kim Jung Un, his father and grandfather before him don't pass urine, nor defecate. They are simply superhuman bearing superpower. Day in, day out lies blasted by their state run media ingrain this weird notion in their gullible head about their perfectly human leaders.

No wonder Trump loves and idolizes Kim Jung Un and sundry dictators like him. He pontificates some of the dangerous lies at time of this Coronavirus crisis which has already claimed nearly 60,000 lives in America. In one of his widely covered White House briefings he advocated intake of disinfectants to get rid of the morbid, obnoxious virus.

It was soon followed by several calls in across in America with people asking if they can consume disinfectants like Clorox to cleanse themselves of Coronavirus. A la those gullible in America who blindly follow Trump, their counterpart extreme Right wingers in India (alluded as BHAKTs) have traced almost all the modern innovations and inventions, everything from Airplanes, Television to Internet to some Sage or Baba from 5,754 BC. Any rational person questioning the veracity of such idiotic propaganda is readily branded as unpatriotic, a perfect candidate for migrating to Pakistan.

Such characteristics are dangerous for Scientific temper and future. But the politicians shamelessly use this for cheap political gains. After all TINI TUNDARE CHHELI KUKURA. A lie repeated three times after all a truth. Repeated 100 times, it becomes gospel.

RIP Irrfan Khan

I started my Wednesday with this bad news. Irfaan Khan, the versatile, talented actor of many Bollywood and Hollywood movies and one of my favorites finally succumbed to his battle with cancer. He was only 53, a tragic young age to go.

I am reminded of his movie "PAAN SINGH TOMAR" where he has done a commendable role playing the leading character Paan Singh - a class IV drop out from the Badlands of Chambal, who joins the Army, where his passion for running is recognized by his Superiors. 

Yes, Indian Army in 1950s was part of a system which was was fair, honest and efficient at a time only a few years after independence. We then still retained the old school of ethics inherited from the English (Corruption hardly existed during British days, but slowly crept in when we owned our own nation).

In this movie Paan Singh's talent was recognized by his Sardar (Sikh) senior in the Army as he makes him run for arriving late during the perfunctory military drills. A la Forrest Gump from the iconic Hollywood movie, he never stopped running. Soon he crashed into limelight when he broke the National record in Steeplechase at the 23rd National Athletics meet held in Cuttack, Odisha. It earns him a ticket to the Asian Games held in Tokyo a few year later, where he ran the 3000m Steeplechase race.

A heart touching saga of a person whose sacrifice to the nation as a Sportsperson and a veteran Army man never came to his rescue, when circumstances turned a hard working, proud patriot into a dacoit-cum-kidnapper. It was in the 1970s when Corruption well aided by the high handedness of Indian bureaucracy did everything possible to turn the man to take to guns for his own survival. The system failed him big time.

In the movie, Irrfan playing Paan Singh is a straight shooter, both from his mouth and gun. When a newspaper reporter interviewed him asks why he became a dacoit, the fugitive retorts back - DAKAIT TO PARLIAMENT MEIN MILTE HAIN, HUM TO SIRF BAAGHI HAI (Dacoits are found in  Parliament, I am just a rebel). He wasn't far from the truth.

Another monologue from Irfaan Khan needs some reflection - "After crossing 28 barriers to be the Steeplechase champion and earning accolades for my motherland, no one cared about me. Now that I have become a Baaghi - a thorn in the flesh of the tri-state (UP, MP and Rajasthan) Police, I am getting the fame and attention. I run and win medals for my country nobody took a note, now when I became a BAAGI  (rebel) on run I make news."

Quite a story and kudos to Irfaan Khan for his remarkable role. You crossed 28 barriers as Pan Singh Tomar. You, the fighter fought bravely against a malignant disease. Salute to you, Sir. Rest in Peace.

Chinese TV Serial - A peep into the Manchurian milieu

The other day I was watching a TV serial. It was the story of two families related to each other via marriage. The boy and girl married to each other are the lone child of their parents. The family of the son feels fortunate, proud and superior to the family of the daughter to whom their son is married to.

The son-in-law was tormenting his wife's family. The guy's parents are proud that their son makes some extra bucks by greasing a few palms. They boast to the girl's parents that how lucky she is to have their son as her husband. But the girl and her parents are unhappy with this liason. Sounds quite familiar, an episode from a typical Indian family SAAS-BAHU (Mother-in-law, Daughter-in-aw) soap opera.

No, you are wrong. It is from a Chinese serial with English subtitles which I stumbled upon while flipping channels the other day. It provided a rare menu into the Manchurian Milieu as the curious me watched it to have a peek into the secretive Chinese society - a country which in 1978 was at par with India, now 4 times India's GDP and already a Superpower flexing its economic and military muscle. But I was surprised that their social fabric and fraca is not so different from us, even now.

No wonder, the Chinese recently relaxed their one child norm, by extending it to two. The strictly implemented one child principle in China has contributed to a skewed male-female ratio, heavily favored to the former. It has  landed the Chinese in not so sweet, but sour soup. The result - Per a recent report are at least 50 million males in China who cannot marry. Solution is very simple. They can take a cue from the Americans, where many states  have legalized gay Marriage.

The similarities doesn't end there. If corruption and other fraudulent practises are epidemic in India, it is rampant in China. But unlike India, every year scores in China are hung until death on corruption charges. Still China which could control Coronavirus but can't control corruption in a nation where without the knowledge and connivance of the authorities, one may not able to fart privately without the government sniffing at you. 

In contrast, forget about any Capital punishment, rarely in India any one gets convicted on corruption charges. If it happens so in rarest of the rare cases, most convictions comes after 20-25 years - a classic case of justice delayed is justice denied.

The population of China now estimated to be 1.4 billion, followed by India's 1.3 billion. It wont be long before we catch up with them, but it might take a few more years now that they have allowed couples to have upto couple of kids. Yet, it was interesting to see the social fabric of two neighbors sharing a civilization of 3000 years isn't a whole lot different.

The State of Georgia opening for Business

A few states in the  United States are all set to open up their economy from tomorrow from the clutches of the Coronavirus. Georgia, my home state is one of them. They will be opening the Hair cut saloons, Gyms from tomorrow followed by Restaurants on Monday. Not sure how can a Barber cut hair from 6 feet distance, considered safe per the guidelines of social distancing.

It has already reported on media that many VYAPAARIs or Businesses folks backed by their hypocrite Conservative allies are prodding a friendly Trump and his fellow Trumpians to prematurely open up the economy - human lives be damned. I say Trumpians because the Republican Party, a party of Abe Lincoln is long dead. It has metamorphosed itself into Trump Party.

No offense to any Businessmen or women. I have some of my close friends who are businessmen with compassionate hearts. Many of them do great service doing charity works, employing people and contributing to the economy. But there are many from their tribe who are ruthless and heartless - the Shylock types, the famous character of Shakespeare's "Merchant of Venice". They value profit over anything else, including human rights and human life, caring a damn about the commoners as long as it fatten their bank balance.

It is not unusual to see such VYAPAARIs (Business folks) preferring profit over death (not their own, of course). That's why we see many of them dying to open up the economy in US when they don't risk dying. A lot of people may die due to this hasty decision. Most of them poor and elderly. All Trump with the help from his VYAPAARI cronies cares about is the Stock market numbers to go up, so that he can sell it as a success towards his reelection bid. Welcome to the United Oligarchy and Kleptocracy of America.

In order to prepare for the economy to open the VYAPAARIS along with their best salesman Donald Trump are hell bent on selling snake oil to the gullible Americans. They are already advocating the use of a Malaria medication as a magic cure for Coronavirus when the medical experts seriously the efficacy of such a drug. I am sure non of these VYAPAARIS or their buddy Conservative Republicans will administer Chloroquine doses to themselves or to their near and dear ones in case they contract this deadly COVID-19. It is for someone else to take that risk and die.

Another sales pitch for opening the economy is that many people will die due to the bad economy and joblessness caused by depression, suicides, drug and alcohol abuse etc. But don't think that will be in epidemic proportion, far less than 3000 dying every day as of today. But it has to be sold with the support of their small but vocal supporters by driving them to street, at the cost of someone else's life.

Why Right wingers believe in such quackery like efficacy of snake oil sort of unproven medicines ? Because they believe in absolute blind loyalty (BHAKTi) towards demagogues, hence prefer quackery to Science (such folks galore aplenty in India too) which their heros sell. Opening up of the economy based on quackery is not only preposterous, it's blasphemous. But the Businessmen and their Republican cronies with go ahead with their plans. After all, enriching themselves at cost of other's life matters. Nothing else matters.

Shakuni - The pioneer of Divide and conquer

The British ruled almost half of the world not just by their superior naval and military strength, but by their uncanny strategic use of "divide and conquer" policy. That is how a nation of shopkeepers (alluded to the English by Napoleon), slightly larger in size than the state of Odisha and Georgia controlled the entire landmass of the Indian subcontinent. They did by playing one King with another, one Community against other, one caste against other caste - exploiting every possible division that existed in society.

The British wasn't the first one to use this strategy. Long before it was tried by one of the prominent characters in India's famous socio-political epic MAHABHARAT, the ubiquitous maternal uncle of the ever ambitious Prince Yuvraj Duryodhan. Just before the final battle of Kurukshetra which continued for 18 long days, Sakuni attempted to divide their opponents Pandava camp by bringing the the latter's chief asset Lord Krishna to Kaurava's side.

A shewd strategist, Shakuni was confident of implementing his master plan to success over the gullible Pandav brothers, but was afraid of one person of matching intelligence who could throw a spanner in his scheming wheels. He was Lord Krishna, who was firmly in Pandav's camp. "YEH VASUDEV KRISHNA HI MERA CHAAL PEHCHAAN SAKTA HAI. USE KISI BHI TARAH UN PANDAVON SE ALAG KARNA HOGA", "It's only Vasudev Krishna who could see my scheming, no body else. We should keep him apart from the 5 brothers" - so said Shakuni to Duryodhan.

The wily King of Gandhar tried his best in this mission. Just before the war he instructed Duryodhan to go to Dwarka and ask Devaki Nandan (son of Devaki as Sri Krishna is known as) for help. A reluctant, egotistical Duryodhan reached Dwarka, the abode of Lord Krishna soon followed by the archer Pandav, Arjun. Vasudev kept his offers open - Either Him who will not hold any weapon vis a vis his all powerful Narayani Sena (Army). Arjun promptly accepted the former, to have his friend Krishna by his side, where as Duryodhan was more than glad to get his Narayani Sena.

Upon returning to Hastinapur, Duryodhan boasted in front of his MAMASHREE (Maternal Uncle) Shakuni how the fool Arjun preferred a virtually useless Krishna to the vast Narayani Sena which Duryodhan got by default. He thought his Uncle will be highly impressed. But Mamashree Shakuni retorted back - "ARRE MURKH BHANJE, YEH KAISI GALTI KAR DIYA", "You moron nephew, what a blunder you did". You are going to pay for this mistake, he opined. Needless to say, it dashed the hope of Sakuni to divide Lord Krishna from the Pandavas who under the patronage of Giridhar (another name for Lord Krishna) went on to win the war.

This is not the only instance where Shakuni used his guile to judge people and use them as pawns like in the game of dice in which he was an expert. Karna - the valiant, generous but illegitimate son of SURYA (Sun God) and a close friend and confidant of Duryodhan was a person of utility for Shakuni who could match Arjun in Archery. In a scene from B R Chopra's Teleserial MAHABHARAT, Shakuni plots the death of the Pandavas with his plans to roast them alive inside their inflammable palace called LAKHYA GRIHA (The Jade House).

When Duryodhan is about the divulge the plans to his buddy Karna, Shakuni dissuades him - "There is no question of Karna's dedication towards you, my dear nephew Duryodhan. But he is just a pawn, part of the larger game towards your goal of your Kingship. It will be not be necessarily wise to divulge all our plans to him. But, keep your friendship alive, as he is our invaluable asset to take on Arjuna, but disclose stuff to him only as and only necessary."

In another scene, Mahatma Vidur, the step brother and Minister of Hastinapur tells the blind yet ambitious King Dhritarastra some hard truth. An irritated Emperor retorted back - "If you were not my brother, I would have punished you". Mahatma Vidur replies politely - " I may be your brother and well wisher, but I am advising the King in my capacity as the Prime Minister of the Kingdom of Hastinapur. I am doing this as my duty, because the duty of the minister is to tell the truth to his King".

Fast forward thousands of years to the year 2020. Anthony Fauci (Director of Center for Disease Control) as Mahatma Vidur is telling his Dhritarastra Trump some harsh truth about the Coronavirus. But blind Trump is unable to see or accept it. Hastinapur was ruined due to the idiosyncrasy of stubborn Duryodhan, same could happen to America due to Trump. After all this is Kalyug, not the Dwapara Yuga of Mahabharat where sense still prevailed. Shakuni and Mahabharat were way ahead of time.